Monday 18 August 2008

Wizard Rock

Oh My God

I know that's an overrated expression to use on the Internet, making you sound like some angsty ZOMG!!!11eleven!!-style teenager, but when I say the three words, I mean them.

Is there a more nerdy, pathetic genre out there?

I've been watching random videos on YouTube to try to find out more about the world of Wizard Rock, or 'Wrock' as it is affectionately known by its fans. And I have one question. Which is also indeed one word.

WHY?

Why do they have to take over everything I love? Sure, I've read all of the books, I got the last three the day they came out and finished them in ridiculously short amounts of time (but I didn't go at midnight, the saddest thing you can possibly do). However, I also got 'Chemical Wedding' before it was published. And I will not tell you how extreme my methods were when I got 'The Missionary Position'. Rock and roll is unconventional, alternative, a different way of life for us awesome people who say 'NO!' to the normal. Now it's in the process of being taken over by geeks. What will they do next? They already have seven epic books, five films so far, two accompaniment books and another on the way, about a million unofficial ones, about half the net devoted to fandom, fanfiction, fanart, etc ... what more do they want?

It would be OK if the new bands were talented. They, sadly, are not. Nearly every band are terrible. I'm not just saying that because I don't like the idea, I'm saying it as a musician and a rock fan. The singers can't sing, and the musicians often have no previous experience, they just feel they can play because they are spreading the Harry Potter word. Hasn't it been spread enough already? The books are the most famous ones in the world, for crying out loud!

OK - there is the point that Led Zeppelin drew inspiration from Lord Of The Rings. Yes indeed they did. However, their name is not 'Frodo and the Hobbits'. And they did not write every song - sorry, did I say write? I meant 'rip every song off from' - the books.

'Wrock' is unimaginative, uncreative, and just plain wrong. Come on, nerds - read Harry Potter and leave rock music alone. You know nothing about it.